When working with a sex addict one of the first homework assignments I give is call “Five Commandments to Freedom.” This tool comes from 101 Freedom Exercises. It is a simple yet effective tool that helps the client maintain sobriety. Here is how it works.
- PRAY in the morning. This step is a simple acknowledgment of the sex addicts desperate need for sobriety. For some this might be a hard step because you have been avoiding spirituality because of your shame and guilt. If you do not believe in God, your prayer might look like this. “God, I don’t believe in you, but I’m supposed to pray. I want to recover. Would you help me stay sober today?”
- PHONE CALLS are to be made every morning to an accountability partner or recovery sex addict. In this phone call the sex addict will state “they are a recovery sex addict and they are not in trouble and should they in get into trouble they will call them again.”
- READ recovery material center around sexual addiction. This helps the client to stay grounded and reminded of the tools that work for sexual addiction.
- GO TO MEETINGS weekly if not daily. The client needs the support of others who know what they are going through or have gone through. The group I recommend is Sexaholics Anonymous. The client cannot beat sexual addiction on their own.
- PRAY at the end of the day. This step is a simple prayer of thankfulness for making it through another day of recovery.
If these five commandments are done correctly, they can go a long way in helping a client stay sober from their sexual addiction. Lastly, all five commandments are centered around an attitude of looking outside oneself for help.
Written By:
Reid Wood, MA, LPC