Sexual Addiction: The 5 Commandments

When working with a sex addict one of the first homework assignments I give is call “Five Commandments to Freedom.” This tool comes from 101 Freedom Exercises. It is a simple yet effective tool that helps the client maintain sobriety. Here is how it works.

  1. PRAY in the morning. This step is a simple acknowledgment of the sex addicts desperate need for sobriety. For some this might be a hard step because you have been avoiding spirituality because of your shame and guilt. If you do not believe in God, your prayer might look like this. “God, I don’t believe in you, but I’m supposed to pray. I want to recover. Would you help me stay sober today?”
  2. PHONE CALLS are to be made every morning to an accountability partner or recovery sex addict. In this phone call the sex addict will state “they are a recovery sex addict and they are not in trouble and should they in get into trouble they will call them again.”
  3. READ recovery material center around sexual addiction. This helps the client to stay grounded and reminded of the tools that work for sexual addiction.
  4. GO TO MEETINGS weekly if not daily. The client needs the support of others who know what they are going through or have gone through. The group I recommend is Sexaholics Anonymous. The client cannot beat sexual addiction on their own.
  5. PRAY at the end of the day. This step is a simple prayer of thankfulness for making it through another day of recovery.

If these five commandments are done correctly, they can go a long way in helping a client stay sober from their sexual addiction. Lastly, all five commandments are centered around an attitude of looking outside oneself for help.


Written By:

Reid Wood, MA, LPC

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